Category Archives: Poetry

Wounds and Betrayals…

Immobile I stand

Midst nowhere

This is exactly where I am

Left wounded

But the silence continues to prevailAAEAAQAAAAAAAALBAAAAJGJmOTQ3ZGMwLWQxMzctNGI5MC1hNTRiLTBkNzBjYzE0OGNhOQ

And the poor aching persists…

I don’t care you still love me or not
I don’t care what you feel about me
I am not afraid to walk alone
because I have been hurt for so long
that nothing affects me now.
I don’t need your ardor anymore
for it’s all so fake.
I believed you loved me
but those were mere pretending.
The thought that you might leave
made my bones shiver
but now it doesn’t even matter
for I have seen the worst.
Your words no more touch my heart
for they are all false.
I curse my own self
for all the times I wept for you
because you never deserved it all.
Your name strikes my mind
and its all hatred I am filled with
I thought you were the one
till I was kept in curtains.
You said you’ll never leave
you said you’ll stand through all
and I believed…

I believed in your feigning
and so, I now stand betrayed!!!

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Nothingness…

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I
should have told
you how I really feel
A little in advance….

Had I been living a daydream?
Was the past a fairy tale and the
Present a hard truth?
My heart is left in pieces
The fogs are finally lifted; But
The destiny remains unchanged.
I still stay far
From surrendering…
Time changes nothing at all
I miss you the same as the day you left

I miss you in the summer warmth, in the
Blowing winds that touch my cheeks,
Your memories come rushing by

Every time I pass the bench we sat on
Over and over again, swallowing me each day…

I hate that you left
Without hearing the words
That I needed you to
The words left unsaid

The expectations unfulfilled,
I’m struggling to hold to nothingness.
There are times
When you sneak out of my mind
And roll down my cheeks
When I know all I want is you
Now all I do is wait for another life
Where I wouldn’t know you at all,
Where I wouldn’t struggle to forget you
Loving you is a heartache that never goes away.

I missed you yesterday and the day before
and I know I will do that tomorrow too.

Every time we have to say goodbye
I’m counting down until we say hello

I never had something that I
Can’t walk away from
When it comes to you, no, I
ain’t got no patience…
But if there is somebody that
Makes you feel perfect
The way I’ve been lacking
Then do what you have to
because I’d never blame you

For not choosing me…

It’s all meant to be…

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Some days even the sun hides behind
the clouds
And you end up being a dead star on a 
night sky
Whirling darkness, lonely weather 
And the pain comes out as tears down 
your cheek…

She lived for ‘and they happily lived 
ever after…’
He hoped for ‘Once upon a time…’

Her heart was a sealed garden & the
walls were very high
Inside her heart she placed dreams
Beyond his reach…

He walked with her, not holding hands
but soul
He made her feel the warmth,Inspite the
walls

A swollen heart 
An undying love
Oh,it’s him again, a hundredth time 
& destroyed self…

She remembers his smile 
That sparkled in his eyes
She remembers the spirit 
That set her free…

As memories grew
They became inseparable 
Every memory remains
As the days past swiftly…

A blatant fate 
A concealed secret 
A blurred vision 
It’s,the fear of future, a mighty 
& poignant reality..

Unforgettable, that’s how he stayed in her
Treasured,where ever he is…
She concealed a secret,too heavy for her to
carry
She made him promise
That he’ll pardon her for
killing him…
He will…won’t he…??

A pair of almond eyes!

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Each raindrop that hits the window glass, it fills up the room with a sudden melancholy. Here I am, silent, trying to hear what the noises are about. People say love strikes you like lightening, a sudden wave rushes down your spine, ecstasy fills the air you breathe and you go singing all day long. Falling in love is like a fairy tale coming true. Each moment you wish that person to be right next to you. She is the first thought in the morning, the smile that persists on your lips and the last kiss of the night. She is a lifetime with a happy ending.Yet I’m trying to figure out the essence of everything, her innocence is what troubles me the most. He first saw her on a moon light. Soon a foreign emotion clouds his eyes…

He ‘was welcomed with her eyes

He gazed at her so much,

Her beauteous brown almond eyes

Made him melt…

He said it will work out,

Though she had her doubts.

He climbed inside her skin

And made all the promises

He made castles beside the sea

Little did she know those castles were of mud.

He didn’t leave till she said yes.

The sands of time slipped by,

She fell in love the day he fell out of it….

 

All the promises he made

Stood like a double headed sword

Ripping her mind and soul apart

Demons stole her breaths, she survived.

Denials pounded through her mind,

Emptiness echoed through her heart

Moments were filled with pain

She still fell for him every morning.

 

Time flew,wedding bells ringing.

She kept the vows. She knew what it meant to say  “yes”.

When they said ‘Love is what that binds you both’,

She wondered was that ‘love’ that suffocated her?

He bent down to slide the ring in her finger. He smiled.

He was cold as ice,

She couldn’t find love in his eyes.

Darkness covering her like a blanket

Gliding deep in to her thoughts,

Yet she smiled back.

Both carried the weight of the ring forever

With no fairy tale ending…

 

 

 

 

.

Immobile…

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Untying my hair, letting it go loose

I lifted my head

To the clouds above

Gentle breeze caressed my face

Rushing past my face

Midst nowhere

I stood there

Finding the lost happiness

Captivated in thoughts

Caught in its chain of web

Seeking the lost me

Somewhere on the road of past

I am not afraid to walk alone anymore

I don’t care if I was right in holding your hands

I don’t care if I was right in choosing you

I don’t care you still love me or not

I don’t care what you feel about me

I don’t care what others think about me

Because I have been hurt for so long

That nothing affects me now…

I don’t need your presence anymore

For it’s all so fake

I believed in your feigning

And so, I now stand betrayed!

I believed in “YOU”!

But those were mere pretending.

I curse my own self

For all the times I wept for you

Because you never deserved it all.

Your words no more touch my heart

for they are all false.

Your name strikes my mind

And its al hatred I am filled with

I thought you were the one

But now it doesn’t even matter

For I have seen the worst

My head is still lifted.

Midst nowhere

Immobile I stand

This is exactly where I am

Left wounded and shattered…

…and you keep waiting

“I’m done with all the lies…telling people that I’m tired In reality I know I’m just sad…wrote something after 3 damn weeks… heavenly feeling”

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Sometimes you get this feeling that you don’t fit

The world is still The people seem strange

Even your dear ones have changed And there is absolutely no connection you feel
All that you want is to escape

Run away from all the troubles Go back home, let out what’s been inside
Cry out loud and feel on your own

That’s not going to happen
Home is also that cold…

There are times when you feel tired of being strong
Of putting together things every time
Of being there for everybody around
And never returned back the favor.
You see days go by with nothing changed
And the pain comes out as tears down your cheek
But you know you can’t help it.

Some days even the sun hides behind the clouds
For the fear of not being ‘wanted’ swallows it too.
There are times when you don’t know where to go
What you want, why this chase…
And you end up being a dead star on a night sky
But nothing still happens, the dark hour prevails
And you keep waiting
You keep waiting….

Sugary Dreams

I had an awesome dream last night…And I ain’t got any place better than this to share it  🙂 ❤

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Sugar coated clouds

In a bath of red

Peachy Sun setting its rays

Grey Waves

Rolling and Running

Giving me the hour of ultimate peace

Looking out

In that sea of gentle tides

As I wander the beach

World still in motion;

Tides still in reach

The lullabies conceived

By the wind chime

Her soft ripples met my feet

It whispered our names again

Unjumbled and unbothered

Drowning in the depths

Of her innermost self

And for an instant

We shared the secrets of

SILENCE

Oh lady Moon…

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Oh silver moon

My old friend

In the stillness of this lonely night

Peeping through my window

You will see me weak

And I won’t lie

Not to you

You will see me bleed

Too many memories under my skin

Too many riddles hidden within

He is gone

I’m lost

Bring back those nights

Drift my love closer to shore

Light the path once we walked together…

Frozen

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I stood there frozen

Beneath a blanket of dust

Forcing me to fall deeper

I have sunken deeply

In to the black hole of mind

My passion

It roared throughout the night

Stretching its paws

Unaware about my dreams fermenting to wine

Intoxicated on the essence of you

Oh, My love

Rewind the clock; let me breathe

I want to feel the delight of magic love

The magic that cradles the world

Come back; I want to feel it again

The pervading fresh scent of love

The sound of Birds on the meadows

Along with the tune of my heart

The Strokes of West Wind against my pale skin

Come back; I want to feel it again

I want to feel the frigid cold winter

Lifting the lashes of calm waters…

Contemplate

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Letting the wind touch my soul

Standing on the edge of shore

Beginning to contemplate reasons

Will my children tell tales of my love and adventures?

Or

Will those tales bring tears?

Stories and fables of wasted potential…

My life

Spins uncontrollably

I’m broken half of someone handsome

I’m the wet shining sand that he sinks his toes in to

I’m the one he tosses aside from shore to shore

I’ll drift through oceans to cling to him like dust

He will carry bits of me to every end of earth

Even when he didn’t wish to

In reality

I must’ve been a fool

To kill myself to get back at him

Was it a life worth living?

Or a

Life worth forgetting?

Let go or Be dragged…

Sometimes in life good bye is the only way even though you never wanted to leave..There comes a time when you have to stop crossing oceans for people who wouldn’t even jump puddles for you…It hurts so much more to keep holding to something that isn’t there…So letting it go will be the only option!

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Does it make any sense

that I’ve broken my own heart?

 Willing to let myself fall

I gave him everything

I’ve fallen for him

I’ve fallen for his charms

I’ve fallen for his words

Walking around

In broken heels

I can hardly breathe

All my dreams

Getting smaller and smaller

My trust was my last defense

Never in my wildest dream

I did expect this to happen

You made the choice

But I guess it was meant to be

Does it make any sense

that I’ve broken my own heart?

My love for you has no meaning but a blur

I feel bare and naked

Unprotected like a child

No amount of passion

Can ever stop this pain

I have no more intent

This is the last one for you,

There’s nothing left I can do.

You were something that I did virtue,

Even when you never had a clue.

Does it make any sense

that I’ve broken my own heart?

Sometimes letting go is the only way…

Black And White Empty Road

…Until he conquers again

rainy-days

The frowning bright blue sky,

Rusted tangerine colored moon

Goes pale in confusion

The night has come

Clouds painted blue in black

Like a feathered spray

Hovering above in sky.

 

Trees casting invisible shadows

Lonesome figures creep along

Sleep seems a far off dream

Where have all the stars gone?

Why does the sky bleed?

The blood flows through my veins

Quenching my sun baked soul

 

Lightning flashed through

The rolling thunder of my dreams

Pouring down with all its might

Washing away my troubles,

Falling freely at last to the ground

Refreshing me with gentle fingers

My feathers brushing against the wind

 

The rain diminishing quietly

Sun is blazing

Once again there is green ground

And the seven colors

Exhibit its departure

Redefining the beauty

From temporary dull to blue

Until the rain conquers again

 

Chance

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The night stumbled

The grief rushed in currents of air

As he gave his final good bye

Her tears of sorrow,

Washed away by his words.

Huddling under overcoats

His mischievous laugh

His care; his swing of love

His cradle of passion

Shadows of things that used to be

hinders her ability to see

into the loneliness of the starless wintry night.

As she walks along this passage

Wondering where he is now,

Does he stare in to space wondering too?

Is he happy, or lonely as she?

She sat there

Tossing rocks in to the calm shimmery water

Wondering what would have been if they had a chance…

Butterfly-Free

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Blanket the newborn

No longer a chrysalis

It has flown to another land

Lost to time and space

Embrace the change…

 

Heart flutters

Wings dragging,

Tethered

Like a deer in trap;

Amongst the flowers,

And above the oceans

 

Another butterfly gets his wings

Takes refuge in the sky

 

He is like him

I can feel it

We touch but we do not embrace

Our eyes lock but we do not gaze.

Though it smells like love

All I feel is pseudo love

The abandon cocoon of love

 

If I could transform my pains

If I was him rather than the cocoon

I want to fly high

Butterfly free

And let my colors explode

Lies…

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I stood there

alone

Feeling like

It was nothing

My night mares

Starts

When I wake up

I’m lost

In

His dreams

They were bright

Like

Sunshine

I’m afraid

I can’t fight forever

I’m chained

You watch me gasp for breath

You watch me stand in storms

You watch me blank out

In my whispers,

Silent breaths

I’ll tell you how things were

I’ll pretend that it was real

My empty lies!!!

Glowing Embers

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Cold and shivering

Scared of life

You left me alone in shivering winter

With a broken soul

The air is stale

I stay captivated by the echoes of silence

I gleefully wander the infinite path,

Leaving memories in burning flames

Ashes to ashes

My whole life has turned to embers

Lying beneath the star lit sky,

Cradled by earth

Upon a barren ground

I’m never content

With life’s endless drama

Always wanting more…

Storm Surprise !!!

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Sitting on bed

On the verge of sleep

My skin pressed to the glass

Air turns heavy

Clouds sweeping sky

Sunset fading slowly into stars

Trees casting shadows

Frigid screams

Mighty thunder

Silver fire

The cold numbing my nose

Drenching my soul with showers

The drops shattering like pearls

Lonesome figures creep along

Pattering, Thuds, Pour

Rejoicing in the chaos

My frown turning to a smile

The spring storm begins

Mist rises from ground

Chill settles in my bones

Dampening my spirits

Frozen with snow!

Ode to woman

Is she something for you?

Is she a readymade machine?

When she’s older, things will change

She’ll learn to suffer pain

Till the point when she won’t know her

She isn’t made to fight

She’ll never be in power

She’s told to settle down

And be a flower

You say her to lower her eyes

You want her to do your works

You want her to never complaint

You want her to spent whole life

In feet of you.

Is she something for you?

Is it because she prefers comfort rather than flaunt?

Is it because she prefers you rather her?

Is it because she prefers family than herself?

Depressing? Is it not?

Can you clarify? Is she something for you?

 Break the cycle

We’re all same…

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(: Smile :)

You gave me a reason to smile

You gave me the wrinkles worth having

Five years have past

Yet your smile remained still

Embracing me

like the ripples in water

I wondered for so long

The reason behind your smile

It’s such a mystery to me

I adore and yet envy thee

Your sparkling eyes

And gleaming grin

You’re insane

And I love it

I wish to be your smile

Like a creamy Sunday delight!!!

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Her Illusions

As she walk in that lonely path

Passing through the endless crowd

She met two eyes

It was different from those all,

who walked past her

They stood there gazing each other

And the whole crowd stopped moving

Is this love?

She’s still dreaming

She’s probably going crazy

She closed her eyes

She can feel that their world

 growing bigger and bigger

When he reciprocate her feelings

She can feel the rain drops

dripping in her stomach

He showered her

with endless memories

Time flew away

She didn’t know when

Truth becomes lies

And promises becomes words…

He walked away

And their love become her only regret

She sits back and feels as if

Their moments have been fading away

And their worlds has been collapsing

Right in front of them

Even without his presence

They are grabbing away her life

How many illusions she has to pass before reaching him?

Sometimes she feel like letting it go

But then he stands right before her eyes

And making her realize

That they weren’t illusions

One day these walls

 Will crumble

One day the door

Will swing wide open

And when the day comes

Remember he is meant to fly higher,

And he will fly back towards her

no one can take that away…

Pain

I know you won’t stay

I know you’re tired

But tears of hope

Filled my heart

Longing you to stay

I want to say those words

You are longing to hear

But these scars in heart

They won’t seem to heal

The pains you made

Are overwhelmingly clear

I get broken a thousand times

And still you didn’t seem to hear

I have spend endless nights

Reminiscing your smile

I tried to clear the mess

All my efforts went useless

I know it’s difficult to live without you

But letting you was the only option left

Unfinished Dreams

“What happens  when thoughts and  emotions meet?”

She’s told to stay strong, keep fighting

But they don’t understand

She’s already lost.

When he left to fight for King

She had no choice to stop him

When he returned

It wasn’t him

It was a shell he used to be.

She’s counting all the time away

Just waiting for everything to end

Forever seems like a long time

I’m unsure what the reason is

I turn around but I can’t seem to let go

What is reality?

And what is dream?

She looks in the mirror

And burst in to tears

His voice pounding in her ears

Empty and lost in life

Sometimes I wonder

If there is someone else out there

Like her.

They say open your eyes

She’s forced to see the darkness

He doesn’t hear her

The darkness shuts out everything.

Come back..

As I grow old

All I hear is a lonely song…

I know he is out there for me

I wish if he could hold me like before

We had our inhibitions in becoming friends

I guess it’s true what they say

how “just friends” never works out the way

But little did I know that our bond is breaking

And soon we are going to grew apart.

All those happy times are gone

And I know life is about moving on

Yet my heart fails to understand it

You were everything I’ve ever needed

I didn’t mean to hurt you

I swear I have nothing to do with this tangled mess

How does ignoring me possibly do you good?

At what point you will stop trying to be better and admit the truth?

If my feelings are irritating I think you’ve misunderstood.

The more you deny the more I seek your presence

People tell me that I’m wrong for falling in love with you

Trust me I have tried so hard to keep you out of my heart

Now I’m ready to get settled for anything you give

Tell me whether you can be happy without me

I can clearly see the loss in your gleaming eyes too

Don’t you dare say that I’m something that you don’t deserve

Because you had your chance for this but you said nothing at all…

Even when this relationship has gone cold

I can clearly hear your voice

And I miss the way you never looked at me.

Now I’m certain that you didn’t mean a thing because

Every time you said you are addicted with me

It was just the whispers of a cheesy play boy

I still remember the day you walked away

It’s because I was thinking you’d look back at me

It’s not that you abandoned me hurt me the most

It’s the thought and memories that you left behind

I tried to paint my heart without scrapping out your memory

I knew missing someone was a kind of pain

But I never knew what it felt like when someone wouldn’t do the same

I swear I tried my best when you left

But I’m tired of pretending that I’m just fine

Your presence still on my skin

It slice through my heart

I don’t want this feeling

I’m haunted by your smile

You are living in my eyes with that goodbye

Please make it go away

Remember the time when you took me out?

Remember the time you held my hands?

Remember the time we shared endless laughs?

Remember the days we fought badly?

So many memories and I just have to ask

Do you remember it all just like that?

Did you enjoy like the way I do?

I have already choked the last tears that will ever come

People look at me and think I’m mad

That’s because they don’t know you like the way I do

I hope you regret on the goodbye you chose to keep

I hope it floats on your head while you’re trying to sleep

I want to speak until you love me

And then leave because that’s what you did

Don’t you dare say me that you wanted to stay

And try to make me believe that I’m something you’ll miss

Like all the normal people I wanted a closure

A closure that I deserve for loving you so much

I want you to know that I’ll be fine

I want you to know that I don’t need your time

I want you to know that I’m not weak

I want you to know that falling out is not easy as falling in

I want you to know that when you say hello I hear baby

I want you to know that when you say no I hear maybe we can

I want you to know that that one thing

I’d like to see is a promise that at least you’ll remember me

Why am I the only one to hear your voices?

Why am I the only one to see your eyes on the stranger?

Why am I missing you when I clearly know that you don’t miss me?

Why should I miss “us” when you never wanted an “us”?

It’s true that love is blind.

The only regret that I’ve is

I should’ve stolen a kiss on that last night

I should’ve given you a reason to fight

I should’ve done something to made you stay

And I guess here was your reason this whole time

How I loved you enough to let go to chase your dreams and not fight.

I hope the seasons fly past me

So fast for me to cope up with this

 the grit and endless hope…

 

 

Loneliness that haunts me…

Tears are words that NEED to be written -Paulo Coelho

My life like many ppl…is just one constant battle between wanting to be alone, but not wanting to be lonely…Need a break from this loneliness that is consuming me as whole…So I took a paper and pen… and this makes my loneliness a counter productive action…


It’s only daytime here in my darkness
with only loneliness as company
I listen to the silence
since no one can hear me.
It’s still daytime in my darkness
with a sun of black coal
my tears fall in a corner
and my silent cries echo.
I’m sitting here alone
In this empty room
which keeps on getting emptier,
Only the light from the street is shining.
And then a loud call for help,
And everything turns black,
I try thinking of something or someone
to help maself out of this,
But nothing comes to my head,
I’m alone…
He came to visit me again today,
I wish that he would stay away,
I didn’t ask for him to come,
I didn’t ask him where he’s from,
I’m happy when he isn’t here.
It’s hard to smile when he appears,
I hope he leaves me soon,
He fills my life with gloom,
Sometimes his visit’s only brief,
A moment spent with no relief.
Sometimes he stays for quite a while,
Unwanted company to live with
Me, then I try to walk away,
But he just wants to come and stay,
The loneliness which haunts me again and again,
Throughout my life….

Butterfly Kisses

"memories are so two-faced..
  Sometimes they hug you so tightly like a long lost friend,
       then the next minute
              they're ripping you apart like your worst enemy..."girl-3

You are my best friend,
Your smile like a silver bell:
Light, pure & free;
You were like the hours of happiness
That  happened only to me.
Lies are all you seem to say,
That it hurts more each day.
That’s why I wish you to go away,
So that I wouldn’t be in pain, anyway.
I still remember those times
when we were
building our dreams
in a sand castle.
But, who would have thought
that time
is like those waves?
Who would have thought
our dreams
could be severed by an hour-glass?
As I walk through this hill
that used to be our playground,
I begin to wonder
Where do those old smiles lie?
Where do those laughter and tears hide?
When will I find them again?
I stare at this spilling hour-glass
Time flies so fast
The things that I used to have
are all gone
If those Pink candy canes and butterfly kisses
Could fulfil all my wishes
Sliding down the rainbow into a sea of gold
To a magical place where we never grow old
I don’t think I’ll ever understand
Just what happened to us
How did two so happy and free
become closed off and unloved?
Now as the sun goes down
I’ll say a prayer
Wishing perhaps for you
But really, life’s not that fair….